"I was just wondering, when you tell people stories from your life, do they ever just NOT believe you?"

yeah, all the time. people probably think I'm a really big liar. tis all truth though. last night is an example for the books haha.

so Ryan and Muffin enter my house as I mix pancake...mix. pancakes made, lets do poppers....

"I feel like... I'm watching this world through a thin mirror...like I'm not far away but just a little not close..."
and that was the start of the morning.

lets do my hair!
bleeeeeaaaaachhhhhh....oh so bleachy, everyones topless (to avoid bleach stains...of course...)

okay, lets drink some beer while it sets. hahah yummm bud light and lime, in cups, with bendy straws. which were proven innefective and pushed aside for chugging.

more poppers

hookah!!!! and poppers...oh  man...so no more sober. dye time!

they each took a side. I was in charge of tinfoil. we were all sitting on my bathroom floor. sitting because standing was officially not an option. we used gloves though. hahahahha. didn't help much...

"it's not racist! we buy our hair dye at EBONY. it IS black people hair dye!"

"ryan I'm asian!"
"thats waisisht!" (which sounds like wasted when you hear it...and the slurring...)

hair dryer to heat up the hair dye....muffin just blows all the tin foil around the bathroom from my head...
intoxication us the mother of invention. found out how to get hair dye off the sink and floor and tub and my face...white toothpaste. yes. why did we try that? don't ask....it works though...

"you completely missed my roots, lemmy fix this...."
yeah..that ended as well as you're thinking it did...

hair dyed, lets get some eats...walkin to mcdonalds with fudge and a few ciggs.
yay for free refills! hahah. I made a hobo bouquet for ryans mom on the way. which means I picked random flowers off trees and peoples grass and put them in a water bottle I found on the street...it was pretty.
"I am planning my whole days spending around that four loco."
we consume foooood and laugh to death.
"ryan...remember when I told you I used a condom? I didn't....you're pregnant"
(ryans look of absolute oh shit wtf do I do)
he didn't hear the last part....and thought it was serious...oh love.
"oh my god! *shows me a broom from under the booth*"
"we should take it"
yeah...we stole a broom from mcdonalds...just cause. then we went to the laundry mat to charge our phones
"ma'am, I found this broom under your table"
"oh"
"would you like it for your fine establishment?"
"um..no..."
well, you tried ryan.
we walked to nicks smoking a hookah....like carrying it as we walked. boss. we still had the broom. yeah...
nicks room is an alternate universe of which logic cannot transend.
"whats going on?"
"he can only travel through skeet"
"oh.." *goes back to sleep*

"because he just has a very sociable penis"

"do you know what a paraplegic cricket is?!" (it was worse than it sounds)

on the way home, I became facinated with osmosis....