it doesn't hurt really so much as...it is irritating. not in an angry way. in the way a new piercing feels irritated. not pain exactly but its uncomfortable and you find yourself paying attention to it when you don't want to. I was at one point one of the most important people in your life, held in a hierarchy reserved for those who guided your life in ways even you couldn't find a way to, and now I matter less than strangers. The balance, it was never quite there anyway.
some days I just want to crawl inside our fantasy land and take a nap. le sigh.
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